When Women Aren’t Crazy and Men Aren’t Stupid


There’s an article making it’s rounds on social media called Why Women Aren’t Crazy.  It has words that I needed to hear.  I didn’t know I needed to hear them, but I did.  This gaslighting thing is one of my Dad’s talents.  The line between doing it and not is one that a lot of guys my age seem to walk.  And it’s something that a really good guy friend of mine is good at avoiding.  Big surprise, I am constantly hurt by my Dad despite my best efforts, and I feel constantly at ease around that friend (despite the opposition of some people close to me).  I struggle to tell my Dad anything, but I’ll tell this other person everything.  Until very recently, I felt guilty about both.  It’s a trust thing.  When I am able to know that I won’t be belittled for my emotions, I can express them and work through them with the other person with relative ease.  And that is a very good thing.  So, before I move on to the rest of this post, thank you, gentlemen who not only let but encourage women to own their emotions.  

Now, I should admit that I’ve been in the wrong.  Sadly enough, when I’m in the wrong, it’s mostly with guys who, even when I’m mad at them, are great guys who I trust with the aforementioned very important trust.  I call them stupid.  I call them obnoxious and obtuse and annoying.  I call them jerks.  And I can’t be more sorry.  It’s all somewhat akin to the part of the article where it says men “continue to burden women because they don’t refuse our burdens as easily”.  I only do this to men who don’t refuse my emotions as easily.  I take pent up memories of hurt from whatever sort of relationship with other guys and take it out on the ones who are nice to me.  It’s an issue.  It’s a very bad and mean thing for me to do.  So, I’m sorry.  For heaven’s sake, I am sorry.  

I’m starting this crazy new adventure in life here soon (like, tomorrow), and part of it is changing the way I deal with relationships.  I pinky promise to think more about what I’m saying.  

Much love,

Me

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